Love & Marriage-Part II

This time, I want to talk about marriage more in the literal sense seeing as how my sister just got married this past weekend (and was the most beautiful bride, I might add).

She was also the most relaxed bride I had ever seen, which only served to enhance her exterior beauty. She understood that the wedding wasn’t about making some feminine fantasy come true, but a formal, rather traditional celebration for families. She whole-heartedly accepted the Korean wedding traditions knowing that was what our family and what her husband’s family wanted. There were no ethereal engagement photos, Snow-white themed decorations adorning the chapel, or vintage 1950 cars sweeping them off to their honeymoon suite. It was simply pink & white, short & sweet.

And this acceptance on my sister’s part taught me much about…teaching. I view the first day of school of this dreamy day where a new chapter begins as I make my vows to educate each one of those shining, pure faces. I become a bashful, blushing bride as I fantasize about the happy year I will lead with my new students. And then that romantic resolution goes flying out the classroom window about after a month. I’m beginning to think that the secret to a long lasting relationship may be facing certain truths.

Therefore, I have mapped out some realities for myself as the big day approaches and I face my new batch of students:

1. They will be annoying. They’re 12 year olds and truth be told, I wasn’t much less annoying at their age.
1. Their main concern is looking good in front of their peers and not so much looking good in front of me.
3. They won’t be self-motivated.
4. They will not like being prodded to be self-motivated.
5. They will not like being prodded to be self-motivated even if you show them love. Or hatred.
6. They must be tricked into doing their work and raising their grade.
7. And the tricks must be engaging, intelligent, and seemingly effortless. Full on David Blaine.
8. But they must be tricked with a heart that’s directed more at their successes than my own.
9. I am not, nor will ever be their mom, sister, or psychologist.
10. It is my job is to teach every single one of them. Even the ones who stink.

Love & Marriage

With my fifth year wrapped up and my sixth year as a teacher quickly approaching, it’s officially the longest relationship I’ve ever been in. And this last year wasn’t such a good year for us: I doubted, dreaded going to work on some days, and the D-word flitted through my mind like a nervous fly (ditch-ditch-ditch!). But I’m glad we made it through the rough patch, because I think there’s something special about teaching. I really do.

A great book called Tools for Teaching has reinvigorated me. In the book is a chapter about Preferred Activity Time (PAT) which are 20 minutes given every Friday that can be added onto or taken away according to the entire class’ cooperation throughout the week. One idea for a PAT is playing academic baseball.

1. Create a baseball diamond in front of the class with masking tape and blank white sheets of paper.

2. Divide the class up into 2 teams

3. Have a “batter” come up from one team, and the teacher is the pitcher who asks if the student would like a single, double, triple, or homerun questions about that week’s lesson. If the students get the question right, they actually stand on base.

4. If the batter is wrong, the teacher calls out “Fly ball!” and the other team who should have their notes out in front, has a chance to answer and make an out.

5. The final score isn’t just based on the number of runs made. Instead, it’s RUNS-OUT=FINAL SCORE. That way, an out becomes a very big deal.

If implemented well, PAT wouldn’t just make every Friday something that the kids and me, the biggest kid in clas, look forward to, but it would increase cooperation, responsibility, and diligence…everything that I dreamt of instilling as a young, love-struck teacher. And, there's also the perk of wearing a baseball player's uniform to match the theme. Moments like these, little glimmers of hope encased in one silly game, make me fall for teaching time and time again.

Education for all

"More broadly, the single most important way to encourage women and girls to stand up for their rights is education, and we can do far more to promote universal education in poor countries"- Nicholas D. Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn

Just like Greg Mortenson, Kristof and WuDunn highlight education as the greatest weapon to fight against the injustices facing third world countries. Which brings me to my first point-why is education labeled as being so important? Aside from my obvious bias (ie. love) for education, I think it makes perfect sense to have an educational safety net set up for struggling countries. Tragically, the most devastated countries around the world suffer from constant, tumultuous change. There is no one right answer available for all the varying questions cropping up about healthcare, government's duties, citizens' roles, economy, etc. But by promoting education, activists such as Mortenson, Kristof, and WuDunn are advocating the rather simple notion of helping the nation's citizens think for themselves, instead of coercing another more powerful nation's notions onto them.

Helping other countries is an enormously complicated issue that I've gotten a glimpse of by standing on the shoulders of these authors, but it's interesting to see how education is unabashedly praised as the catalyst for change. Which brings to my second point.

On my very first interview with LAUSD 6 years ago, I was handed this:

My interviewer gave me this after asking me why I wanted to teach and I answered, "Because it's something I know I'll do passionately". Perhaps he knew that I would inevitably resort to shut-up-and-do-your-worksheet days at some point; that I would lose my patience, passion, and even hope on the worst ones. So maybe he gave me this card as a physical reminder, a talisman of sorts, to bring forth the initial passion I had for education.

But more powerful than this card in solidifying my faith in education is reading about how education is at its best is enlightening, empowering, or to put it simply-useful. Whether teaching in rural Cambodia or in an urban American school, ALL children can use a critical mind and a strong voice. The power of education is far reaching and universal.

Temptation

I know I'm not perfect. I will never look like Gisele, I will never sing like Celine, and I don't own the most charming restaurant in Berkeley like Alice Waters.

But, this undeniably empirical fact goes flying out the window when it comes to teaching. Oh how I want to be perfect! How I dream of my classroom looking perfect, my lesson being perfect, and my students being perfectly happy to learn as opposed to sitting in my classroom due to a mandated federal law.

What a perfectly tantalizing fruit and a noble pedestal to stand upon, this desire for perfection...or is it? What if it is Eve's forbidden apple, waiting for that first bite to unleash pandora's box of monstrosities? Having chomped a big bite, I found the most controlling behavior unleashed within me, all in the crusade for perfection.

I have to be wary against this pitfall next year because schools aren't perfect, students aren't perfect, and to my own sadness, I am not perfect.

Curtain call

There are few pleasures as deeply satisfying as seeing someone use a gift that you have given to him or her. Months after the birthday, holiday, or the occasion that called for a celebration has passed, to see the person take out your gift, now worn with use and love, fills the heart with a sense of meaning.

I love giving useful gifts that blend seamlessly into life's routines to remind the person of your love for them in the most mundane moments. It is perhaps this love of useful gifts that makes teaching so attractive to me.

It's a dream of mine to have students come back to me in the future and to say that they've learned something useful to their lives. And this fantasy seems acutely out of reach in years such as this past one, where the 9 month school year journey seemed long and weary. But as I made the announcement, "Ok, take your warm up notebook home today, because that was the very last English warm up we'll do", I felt a wave of sadness and premature nostalgia for times gone by.

A year can be hard, easy, heart-wrenching, or unemotional. But it goes by quickly, a blip in the road of life. I wish that I had shown more empathy, compassion, and love to those 150 hooligans. But most of all, I hope that I've given them the gift of knowledge to use forever.

Because you loved me

There are some things that will never go out of style...

Chanel,

Caviar,

Compassion,

and Celine Dion.

From my mom who can barely speak English but belts out "The Power of love" verbatim to the teen phenomenon Charice Pempengco, everyone seems to melt for Celine.


It is the last week of school and I'm planning to teach my very last lesson using Celine's "Because you loved me". Chock full of idioms and metaphors, this song lends itself perfectly to the thank you card project I've assigned. Students must write a card to whomever has helped them academically their tumultuous journey called "The Seventh Grade" using figurative language in their writing.


I'm hoping that Celine inspires them to eloquently express their gratitude. And that they enjoy this KOST FM classic as much as I do.


Because you loved me


You gave me wings and made me fly
You touched my hand I could touch the sky
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me
You said no star was out of reach

You stood by me and I stood tall
I had your love, I had it all
I'm grateful for each day you gave me

Maybe, I don't know that much
But I know this much is true
I was blessed because
I was loved by you

You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me

Menu du jour: Perspective

A day off of work.

Waking up at 10:30 am

Breakfast- pain au chocolat and a cappuccino

Right as 4th period is ending.

Attending a friend's birthday party,

Watching the curling smoke of a blown out wick,

and just like that,

Time disappears before my very eyes.

Only 8 hours in a school day,

A window of opportunity to build greatness

or brew a pot of percolating stress.

Ending the day by writing an essay in the hopes of scoring a trip to Paris & London

because I am, after all, in the business of hope.